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Archives for December 2015

Today’s amended First Amendment

Amendment I

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, except for Muslims and any religion slightly resembling it; or abridging the freedom of speech, excluding Muslims and any religion slightly resembling it,), or of the press excluding Muslims; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble (Muslims excluded), and to petition the government for a redress of grievances except in instances regarding Muslims.

Swept away

Dear Mr. Krutch: What makes you fume?

An easy answer, my lad, Desert Broom.

Why is that, sir?

There’s no proper place here for broom.

It is a rotten unrepentant renegade.

It has cotton mouth and spits it into the desert like a spittoon.

The broom sucks water and takes all the room.

It sweeps up its quietly vegetating neighbors makes them weep for water.

It is oppressive, anarchical and an annoying mutant.

If it were a person, it would be Vladimir Putant.