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B-dee, b-dee, b-dee, That’s All Folks!

The best solution for the Scalia vacancy is for Obama to nominate Daffy Duck to replace him (Bugs is far too liberal). That way the Supreme Court of the United States would better fit the Republican United States Senate as well as the gaggle of Republican presidential aspirants, and we would be more accurately known as the United States of Looney Tunes.

After shoveling 8 cubic feet of steer manure and needing about 5 more, I feel like I should be on the New Hampshire ballot. I’m dubious that everything will be coming up roses after tomorrow.

It is odd that everyone seems to hate Raphael Theodore Cruz and yet he wins elections. It would be interesting if he were elected: He would lead the charge to end ObamaCare, Medicare, Social Security, federal aid to education, the Veteran’s Administration, the income tax, the EPA the federal reserve and most likely any federal program not designed to kill people. He is the Living Undo Button. (I have been reading Jane Mayer’s “Dark Money.” It should be mandatory reading for every voter. Things don’t necessarily Go Better with Koch.)





All things in moderation and severity

The New York Times today published a Page One story about Kenny Stabler, the great quarterback of the Oakland Raiders who died last year. It was disclosed this week that he suffered from chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE), a disease provoked by repeated blows to the head. Stabler died of colon cancer, but the results of an autopsy were just released.

The story quoted a doctor who described Stabler’s affliction thusly:

“He had moderately severe disease …Pretty classic. It may be surprising since he was a quarterback, but certainly the lesions were widespread, and they were quite severe, affecting many regions of the brain.”

I do not know which planet this doctor was from, but it is not possible on this Earth to have a malady that is “moderately severe.” We are not part of a galaxy that mixes moderation with severity. In this universe, the terms are mutually exclusive. One could even say they were contradictory.

Perhaps the explanation is this is simply medical parlance, and there are terms such as “benignly severe” or even “severely moderate” that have meaning for physicians. If so, God help us.

The Rillito runs

I cannot remember when the Rillito has flowed so long. It seems like a week. I would never have guessed that snow melt could have lasted so long. Moreover, it runs clear. This year seems to destined to be very different, confusingly so. My roses, before I pruned them, seemed particularly disoriented. One or two delivered blooms. A blooming rose in January. That El Niño is special.


On Monday, John Bel Edwards took the oath of office as governor of Louisiana. On Tuesday, Gov. Edwards expanded his state’s Medicaid coverage to include what the NYT said would amount to “hundreds of thousands of people.”

In signing the order, Edwards said:

“We are consistently ranked one of the poorest and unhealthiest states, and this cycle will not be broken as long as anyone in Louisiana has to choose between their health and their financial security.”

“This will not only afford them peace of mind, but also to help prevent them from slipping further into poverty and give them a fighting chance for a better life.”

It is astonishing that a politician would actually state publicly that government might help people.

It is a wonder when that politician fulfills a campaign promise on his second day in office.

Edwards is a Democrat, the only living example of the species in the South.


Commie capitalist running dogs

What hath China wrought?

Copper prices have fallen 25 percent.

Oil companies have laid off a quarter million workers as prices imitate the skydiver whose parachute doesn’t open. Oil is $30 a barrel.

China created this mess. It created the demand. Now it’s going bust with the cosmic belch felt around the world.

Chairman Mao would not, we suspect, approve. It was in the time of Mao, after all, when the phrase “CAPITALIST RUNNING DOGS” was coined by the crazy commie denizens of what used to be known as Peking.

Pitifully ironic, ain’t it. So we pause amid the oil, copper, nickel, iron ore, palladium and platinum gluts to tip our hat to George Orwell: “Four legs good. Two legs better.”

Five years hence

Five years ago today Tucson was forced to endure random murder and chaos. People were shot and recovered. Some died. Since then, many more have been killed. This nation is dedicated to the proposition that all people should have the means, the guns, to kill others. It happens so frequently that it has become a sort of American pastime. Anymore, we hardly blink an eye when confronted by murder by handgun.

No one, except for the president alone, has tried to do a thing about it.

The New York Times reports the stock of two firearms manufacturers is on the rise. The stock is a good buy because the killing bidness in this country is in full flower, waxing behind the promise of astonishing profits in killing our fellow man, woman and, in particular, child. This is the American Nightmare that our politicians embrace as though it were the American Dream. Just as there is apparently no serious recourse to ending the insanity of gun violence, there can be precious little faith in the once noble ideal that this is a nation of the people, by the people and for the people. Just substitute “gun” for “people,” and you have what we are, the NRA nation, violent, brutal and deadly. None dare call this civilization.

Cold Feet

I am not alone in my disgust with the weather. It was a beautiful day yesterday (Sunday). And now this. We are in the Wet. Surely snow is inevitable. This is ABnormal. It is currently 48 degrees. the rain is unrelenting. This is not my desert.

El Niño schmeaño.

Today’s amended First Amendment

Amendment I

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, except for Muslims and any religion slightly resembling it; or abridging the freedom of speech, excluding Muslims and any religion slightly resembling it,), or of the press excluding Muslims; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble (Muslims excluded), and to petition the government for a redress of grievances except in instances regarding Muslims.

Swept away

Dear Mr. Krutch: What makes you fume?

An easy answer, my lad, Desert Broom.

Why is that, sir?

There’s no proper place here for broom.

It is a rotten unrepentant renegade.

It has cotton mouth and spits it into the desert like a spittoon.

The broom sucks water and takes all the room.

It sweeps up its quietly vegetating neighbors makes them weep for water.

It is oppressive, anarchical and an annoying mutant.

If it were a person, it would be Vladimir Putant.